Its impossible to find a girl who doesn’t want to know what a man thinks about. However, humanity can’t find an answer to the eternal question of ‘how to understand a man.’
Even the fact that men are considered to be quite simple and logic “creatures” compared to emotional and impulsive women does not make things easier. Let’s try to sort this out.
What do men and women seek for in their relationships?
To begin with, we’d like to offer you to do a mini-test, just for fun. This with clear up the needs of men and women in their relationships. Please, choose one of the statements that you think are true:
- To love a man means to respect him.
- Many deeds of a man result from his insecurity.
- If man loves a woman he wants to provide her with everything.
- The most important thing for men is sex.
- Even if a man loves his woman, he will still look at other women.
- All men are romantics.
- If a woman doesn’t respect her man’s opinion, she doesn’t respect her man.
- Men do not love beautiful women; they love those women who take good care of themselves.
- Romanticism for men is always an adventure, in which sex is a bonus
Let’s just stay clear that all these questions are taken from a popular research done by a number of American psychologists (our readers will probably be surprised as Americans are a quite different nation!) Let’s compare, shall we? Have you picked your variants? Now let’s see how your opinion differs from an average one.
We have polled 70 people (not as many as we expected) and here is what our society thinks about it. By the way, the first thing men said after seeing this test was ‘how weird those questions are?’ At the same time, only 2 girls were surprised with these questions. Probably, this fact itself tells a lot. So, 30 out of 34 polled women think that respect means a lot to men, i.e. men want to be respected. 25 out of 35 men share this opinion (strangely, the number is lower). On the other hand, a bigger number of men than women agree that a more specific question about respect – question №7 is true. This is probably explained by women’s general perception of respect, according to which they still have room for command.
Question #8 is ranked second among women. This is a question about men liking “well-groomed” women. Only 15 men think this statement is true; others said they loved beautiful women. How can one understand secret feelings of a man, go figure. At the same time, half of respondents of both sexes agree that men look at other women no matter how much they love their significant others.
The idea of men’s duty to provide their women with everything is supported mostly by men (although the number of women who agree to it is also high). Romance was not discussed much; both sexes think that men are not romantic. Well, that happens.
Same thing with sex; girls simply eluded this question while men strongly confirmed that sex is very important and is a primary thing. All respondent were vague about their lack of confidence saying that anything can happen.
We’ll simply have to believe them. Another interesting fact is that family couples gave the same answers without arranging their answers. Of course, living together, they know a lot about each other. We’ll consider their answers to be realistic.
So, what conclusions can we come to? Girls have certain knowledge. Not all of them and not about everything. Moreover, statistic is abstract. It partially related to life (no one knows how exactly).
How to Understand What a Man Wants?
- The need to be respected
- Sexual sphere
- Striving to be a “real man”
- Love to beauty
So, let’s start!
Man’s Need to Be Respected
Men want to be respected. Where does this need originate from? Is not on the list of women’s needs? Of course it is, it’s just that more the majority of women (even not for all of them) love is way more important than respect, which is not peculiar to men. Probably the nature of men dictates its terms.
A man is created to be a warrior, a breadwinner, a leader (here we (girls) should not “hush”, protest, or make cynical comments). Compare our and their physiology – a man’s body can endure big workload (I mean strength, not endurance, which make women incomparable as they need to carry and give birth to children); their logical thinking and stable psychic lead us to the conclusion that they are born to be leaders.
By the by, women’s body is more tender, logic is often replace by intuition, not to mention impulsiveness (here we talk about general tendencies and not individuals). But, for a man to be able to act, to lead, he must be sure that others consider his opinion to be authoritative. Here is your need to be respected!
No wonder why men often ask if others respect them when they drink. So, why aren’t men quite respected nowadays? Is it because of the girls who want to be equal with men? Most of us may not be feminists, but many of us do not want to understand what men want and often forget to show respect to them.
Meanwhile, pay attention to the results of our survey and the answer of many guys and girls: a man wants to be respected so much that this respect matches love in terms of his priorities! Now try to think how often you banter your man, have disputed with him and try to set your point of view above his.
Do you often talk lightly about him in his presence? DO you just joke about his needs? It seems to be a mistake for the majority of women – everyone knows that a man must be respected, but everyone forgets about it! (I truly hope I’m being wrong).
You may say: let them behave like real men then we’ll respect them! We will talk about real a bit later, but what should we (girls) do about this famous men’s need? Respect them with words, deeds, believe in his abilities, listen to his opinion, talk with respect, and treat him with respect around others. Otherwise, your man will feel himself uncomfortable, which will reflect on you.
Men’s Attitude to Sex
Who hasn’t heard (and probably said a lot): “There’s only one thing on their mind!”? Reality (as well as our survey) shows that this statement is incorrect. Despite this you should agree that men treat sex rather seriously. They are created with the task of reproduction. Naturally, there are tons of jokes related to this, but they are inappropriate here. If we really want to know what men and women want from their relationships, we realize that needs are not to be laughed at, they are to be met (just as the need to eat).
Wise old ladies used to say: “A path to a man’s heart lies through his stomach”. Here, caring about the person you love is important, even if your needs do not coincide. So, why do we keep talking about such elementary things for the hundredth time? Probably, that is because sex is not a priority for the majority of women as opposed to emotional display of love.
I guess, men will tell you about relationships with the opposite sex more than women, so, don’t lose a chance learn about it in details. What should a woman do for her man? She should she add sex to the list of priorities and be more active in this matter. Now, we will talk about such fundamental need of a man as striving to be a “real” man.
Striving to Be a “Real” Man
No one, including men, can say what being a real man actually means. This may denote being strong (they say – men never cry), having a good salary and providing your family, having certain success in life, etc. But, since there is no definition of a “real” man, how do men know whether they are real or not? How do real men behave themselves? From young age, they need to learn this, make mistakes, gain confidence, authority, and ability to earn money and so on.
If a man is not confident, it will be seen from his deeds, whether it is a try to seduce all women or earn all money in the world. Naturally, such insecurity disappears with age, when a man stands firmly on his feet. However, his wish to be a man with capital M remains.
How can most women understand what a man wants, why do they waste energy on work and friends (another field of men’s balance)? If loves you, how can he spend so little time with you, giving the rest of his soul to “others”. It turns out that the essence of a man lies in establishing himself.
Unlike women, men place higher priority for this need than for love. This is also related to the striving of a man to provide his family. Pay attention to the results of the survey. Look, how many respondents agreed that a loving man should do everything to provide and support her! So, ladies should complain less about their men being busy and should support their striving to earn more money. What should a woman do for her man? Approve, support, understand, not to waste his money.
Love of a Man to Beauty
This characteristic feature of men is another ground to make jokes (there are so many jokes about men’s dignity). Both men and women understand that men love with their eyes and often, even if they love you, they look at pretty girls and there is nothing you can do about it!
This is not very pleasant for us (even if we belong to these pretty ladies), but we need to understand concealed feelings of a man. The thing is that they can’t not to look. Moreover, an image of a pretty girl stays with them. The question is what they do with these images later. Do they reproduce the image or refuse to do it for the sake of us?
Good thing is that looking on other women often do not influence on their feeling to you. By the way, about you! If a man loves with his eyes, should we “loosen” ourselves? Many will sigh, like “I’m not a beautiful lady”. What should those who do not have natural beauty do? They say, don’t be pretty, be happy. It is true, although, we should always look after ourselves.
Of course, there times when we are tired and do not want to do anything. Probably, this is the moment when each of us should remember how men like beauty (and how beauty is form of other ladies like men). That is why, ladies, respect your men in a way, that you always look beautiful around them (leave a robe, hair rollers, and facial green masks for urban solitude!). What should a woman do for her man?
Understand, improve herself and attract his attention with her appearance and style. We have discussed how to understand men by only four features of a man’s nature that every woman should know about. Of course, there are a lot more. Every personality possess inner world so deep with its individual characteristics, that the whole life may not be enough to reveal it. Nevertheless, we should learn to understand what our (and not only our) man wants in irder to make life easier and more pleasant. Be happy!